Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Just kidding?

I've noticed lately that people are starting to take me seriously. Something about being a vet student makes people think that you're able to mystically diagnose whatever obscure illness their pet has or had 12 years ago, based on the symptoms they happen to remember and describe in vague terms. Unfortunately, I have a rather dry sense of humor and a tendency to deliver improbable, random diagnoses with a straight face. I don't know if it's simply the fact that I'm in school, or the fact that I can use bigger words more often now that's lending me more credibility, but I've had to quickly retract smart-ass comments several times lately. It usually goes something like this:

Friend/neighbor/checkout person in Kroger: I gave my dog a rawhide chew 2 months ago, and last week she threw up on the bathroom rug. Then this morning my other dog's ears were droopy. What do you think caused that?

Me: (Insert scientific name of whatever I happen to remember from our most recent parasitology class, bonus points for me if it actually causes vomiting). It's most common in pigs, but you never know. Have your dogs been raised with pigs?

They then start fretting over the long, scary name I've just introduced. Never mind that neither one of us really knows much about the parasite, and the "problem" is most likely not parasitic. I sometimes forget that I actually have a certain amount of credibility now, and there are some responsibilities that go along with that.

On the other hand, I've gotten used to people ignoring my advice, so maybe I'm not fully to blame for my sociopathic conversational tendencies. I was recently approached for advice about a horse that I had been asked about 3 years ago when I was a lowly vet tech. At that time all signs and use history pointed to a hock-sore horse. He belongs to a friend of mine who used to rope calves with him, now his girlfriend is using him for a barrel horse. I asked if the owner had ever gotten his hocks checked out like we had discussed years earlier, only to be told that he hadn't because he didn't think that hock injection was safe. In spite of numerous conversations with my friend, this was the first I'd heard of his misgivings about joint injection. He had sought my advice, ignored it completely, and now they were asking me again...after having tried various voodoo methods to treat the signs of soreness that the horse has. I adore and respect these friends, and I always will, but I'd like to see them run in a track meet every weekend with a broken ankle, while offering them treatment for their sore muscles. Ok, it's a weak analogy, but seriously, treat the cause of the symptoms and you can stop treating the symptoms! And, if you seek advice but are uncomfortable with the recommendation, let me know what you're unsure about so I can at least try to justify my suggestion!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Green beans!

I would just like to announce that I added green beans to my Hamburger Helper tonight...I am officially an adult! Score!

OK, so that might not exactly seal the deal, but it's progress, and tasty progress, at that. I'm taking a night off studying tonight and watching some brain-rotting television. I figure since I'm eating "healthy" it will balance out, right? One conclusion my channel surfing odyssey has led me to is that chicks are crazy. I'm a girl, but seriously, chicks are crazy. These wedding shows are out of control. How do these girls justify spending so much time, energy, and money on one day? And really, does it matter? If people put half that much effort into maintaining the relationship after the ceremony, the divorce rate in this country wouldn't be nearly so high.

Not that I'm any authority on relationships...I handle them about as well as I handle healthy eating. Once in a while I throw the green beans in there, but most of the time my "go-to" food groups are Cheez-Its and Mountain Dew. Pretty darn tasty, but eventually you crash and burn.

Thursday, September 16, 2010


This blog is in danger of becoming another abandoned project in my life. There's not anything particularly heinous about that, but I'm not ready to quit just yet. I'm trying to make some changes in my overall lifestyle this year and I think that making myself keep up with the blog will help me stay focused with the more important things I'm working on. I survived 1st year, and 2nd year is off to a better start. My head was in a bad place last May. I need to make some changes to make sure I don't end up back there.

I'm getting older and it's time to grow up. In some ways I've always been mature for my age, in others I'm still just a bratty kid. I don't want to ditch everything childish, but really, if I don't start taking better care of myself I'm going to become a cautionary tale. I don't sleep enough, I don't maintain personal relationships well, I never go to the doctor, and I eat absolute crap. While I don't plan to start scheduling annual check ups until I can afford health insurance again, I do need to start taking better care of myself and the people in my life. The first big step that I've taken in the right direction is to limit my alcohol consumption. I wasn't exactly a skid-row drunk, but I had built a pretty good record of binge drinking that was starting to creep in on my everyday life a bit too much. I've seen alcoholism close up all my life and it pisses me off that I almost let myself go down that road.

Next, and perhaps more challenging, I've set a goal of eating healthier...not that I'm going to become one of those grilled fish and salad every night kind of folks, just going to get better about keeping fruits and veggies around instead of living on Chef Boyardee and microwave pizza. Jalepenos are a fruit, right?